Kill the Boy Band by Goldy Moldavsky

kill-boy-band

RATING: 2/5

SYNOPSIS: When four friends accidentally kidnap the least popular member of their favorite boy band, things go from bad to worse as they figure out what they should do with this celebrity, try not to get caught, and get as much insider information as they can.

 

While the characters of this novel don’t seem to act like fifteen-year-old girls, they do talk like fifteen-year-old girls and that’s the only positive thing that I can think to say about this book. For one thing I think the narrator over explains what being a fangirl is because I’m pretty sure most people reading this book will know what she’s talking about and for another the boy band is very obviously a One Direction knock-off and that really dates this novel. Personally I would’ve made the boy band sound like every boy band that ever was and ever will be, so that it doesn’t matter what the top boy band of that decade is, it’ll still be applicable. There were also so many moments where the characters acted in ways that just weren’t believable and really took me out of the story. While I did enjoy that it was possible for the narrator to be unreliable in telling us the story, there wasn’t enough unreliability to make it interesting. I also had a hard time believing that this girls were really fans of this boy band. I mean sure lots of useless facts about the members were stated, but they never talked about what it was about the group as a whole or even the songs that they really liked. It was a cool idea and I think it either needed to go more campy or more gritty in order to make everything come together. All the fangirl stuff didn’t do the story any justice. The thing that really made me mad was when the whole plot is tied together it is done in the most nonchalant way and the motive didn’t make any sense at all. It was so stupid. I think the only parts that felt well-motivated and realistic were Erin’s motives for all her actions and then the hipster bartender guy who mansplains to our narrator why liking boy bands is stupid. I’ve heard that reasoning so many times in my life and on the internet that it was the one part that I was like, yes there really are people like that in the world. I really wanted to like this book because I love boy bands and I love well thought out and well made spoofs, but nothing was clicking for me while I was reading and I was left completely unsatisfied.

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